You know, there are a million funny moments in raising a little one. I so don't want to forget any of them. My mom is constantly drilling me "write that down!!" when I tell her funny stories. Life w/ toddlers is just made of them! Just a little one today just speaks of the kind of girl little Abigail is, well always has been if you can say that of a 20 month old! The kid was born hating the limitations of her youth. My sister used to say when she was mere weeks old, she'd never known a baby who so obviously hated being a baby, but was more like a 20 year old girl trapped in a baby's body. She's always prefered to hold her head up way early and face her visitors, no cuddling against mommy and be quietly admired. She prefered to be a part of the social scene and the conversation literally from her very first converstations. I don't know who she gets it from but it's both facinating and pitiful to watch. She gets so mad and angry at herself when her body and development won't allow her to do something she mentally wants to be able to handle on her own. From using a fork, to dressing herself, washing herself, down to unloading the groceries both out of the car and putting them away in the kitchen. Heaven help you if you take 'her bag' away from her before she's had a chance to empty it correctly. An amazing maturity and determination surrounds her personality, but she's still also content to cuddle in our arms and be our still sweet baby girl when she just needs our love. I'm so thankful for that! It's going to be a real ride to raise this one let me tell you. But to get back to my story. We went to the grocery store today, at a bad time no doubt 4:30 when everyone's making their last stops. The aisles were packed w/ post work tired people. We had a big trip to do but just couldn't get there at 9am when you can move in there. Some days Abigail just won't have anything to do with something she's always done willingly before. Today it was riding in the cart. I was very tired. It had been a 'don't put me down' day which always wear me out. They usually coincide w/ teething, not enough sleep, you know the drill. Anyway we get in the door and the fit starts. Erect back and 'mommy hold me' arms outstretched I gave in. I know, Dr. Dobson would always have the energy to scold and be firm and win the battle. Some days, I'm just too pooped to fight it. Sue me! Anyway, not wanting the embarrassing scene I proceeded to carry my little 22 pounder around like a sac of clingy potatoes. Happy though she was she got heavier the fuller my cart got. And of course I get the bum wheel cart so every 3 steps I'm pushing w/ one arm and kicking the dern thing to the left to keep it from hitting the little old lady in front of us. Never shop on a Tuesday, I always forget that!! Finally my arm had enough and I let shorty down to breath. The tiny little 20 year old took over pushing for me. So stupid cute she couldn't see a thing but she was all into 'helping'. Most people passed and thought I was just the worst, slowest driver of grocery carts ever cause they couldn't see the driver. Poor dears! But she was so proud of herself I just kept us out of their way so they could pass and took our time. To pick up the pace at the end of the trip I carried her once again and opted to pull my full cart from the front cause I could avoid hitting people better that way. I can't tell you how many people looked at me and almost looked w/ pitty at us. I got so many "whew, that looks tiring", But you know what!? It worked for us and the little dear was happy as she could be. I was just thankful cause there are so many moments as a mom you can so easily get wrapped up in how inconvenient it can be to manage tasks , fatigue and children. But I laughed at their pitty and instead smooched all over my sweet BIG girl with my shaking arms in the check out line. That Trace Adkins song 'You're going to miss this' kept running through my head and I just ate her stubborn self up. The Bit and I had a successful trip and enjoyed each other. We got home singing to the top of our lungs to Elmo and she helped w/ carrying her 2 bags of groceries into the house and putting them 'away'. I know it gets difficult sometimes. I know that I may not always win the little battles or even choose to fight them, but you know what? I am going to miss this someday, when she's 18 she won't be cool w/ my stroking her hair and smooching her in the check out line when I feel the urge. I know I'll still want too, she's my girl! That won't ever change, she'll just be better at pushing the carts by then!
