Tuggs... my first child

"my cotton mouth"

"fuzzy face"

"The beeeeeeb"

I always considered myself a dog lover growing up.  Well, really an animal lover but our cocker spaniels were my closest buddies running around our country home.  The cats always kept us in good company.  They were mass breeding little baby sitters actually.  My parents were very much NOT the responsible pet owners and never took Bob Barker's advice to have your pets sprayed or neutered.  At one point we had,  (no lie) 21 cats that we counted on our 8 acre corner of the world.   We used to sit on blankets in the yard and play for hours with kittens upon more kittens in the summer sun.  We named them all, and had an elaborate family tree of who beget who usually having a couple of standard super producers at the head.  R.I.P. sweet cross eyed stud muffin Flower (sorry Sue was young when she named your masculine self) and your many wives (Sugar, Minerva, Chevy Checker, to name a few ).    It was probably one of my parent's more brilliant moves to allow this over population to take over our home.   It kept us busy, kept the snakes away and kept us outside and wildly entertained enjoying our feline family.    Now being a mother myself I fully understand how my own would seek any and all help to get me and my 2 sisters OUTSIDE!
    But it wasn't until my sophomore year of college that my heart got fully swayed to the loyalty of the domestic cat.   My sister Sue and I got off campus and rented an apartment together  with a couple other responsible young ladies.  :)    Having never lived with out furry friends around we felt a deep void in our living space.   Susan took initiative and headed down to the local SPCA one afternoon to take care of our need.  She returned with a tiny grey ball of energy with ridiculously huge Caribbean green eyes.  It was the eyes that won her over.    We all had a ball playing with her and she seemed to welcome her new home environment of rowdy 19 yr olds.    It took a day or 2 before my sister started to feel a strange guilt for purchasing a new cat when her own cat still was back home at mom and dads.  She was missing her long haired princess Victoria and felt she had betrayed her in buying this new spring kitten.   So she threatened to return our new kitten back to the SPCA unless one of us stepped up to be her sole owner.  Well I would hear nothing of returning this wonderful new addition so I happily agreed to take full responsibility for her.   It was easy since she had already taken to sleeping on my pillow at night.   She chose me so I chose her.  And a long deep relationship and bond took it's first form.
    I named her Tuggle.  It was a perfect fit in honor of a wonderful character with long legs and sassy style from a favorite old movie of mine, the 1960 classic film 'Where The Boys Are'. Tuggle and I have been through a wild ride of life events together.  When I look back over the span of time our friendship has taken together it makes me smile all the way down to my heart strings.    Eighteen years is a long time in a woman's life.
  She's cuddled me through studying for college courses late into the night sleeping on my heavy textbooks for attention.  I remember her chasing my pencil as I attempted homework and tedious nursing school care plans.   I remember how chubby she got when I left her with my parents when I spent a month in Guatemala.  She got a daily dose of ham to ease the pang of her longing for my return. She fully supported my crazy sleep patterns my many years of working the night shift. Always so happy to crawl into bed and sleep any odd hours away with me.  She pooped on my bridesmaid's pillow the morning of my wedding.  I think she sensed the stress of the day and took it out on my house guest, but it made us laugh and broke the tension.   I cried in her fur when I missed my soldier and feared for his safety.  She was my family when Christmas morning came and it was just me and her.  I loaded up gifts for her under our Charlie Brown tree that year he was in Afghanistan. She was extra cute to make me giggle in my loneliness as she chased the toys and wrapping paper shreds.   She kept me company every time I would sit long hours into the night nursing my babies in the dark.  She's moved into 6 homes with me. Always staking a claim on my sunny bedroom window perch in each locale. Even now, she provides a silent companionship in my noisy life when I scoop her up to sneak away for a quiet bubble bath.  Locking the bathroom door to pretend it's the old days when it was just us two for so many years.  Even when the kids bang on the door she doesn't flinch knowing they can't interrupt this ritual of serenity sought.   It's our time. 
     I know some people aren't animal lovers.  I don't think they are normal actually.  I don't have many if any in my life because I don't understand them.   I think God deliberately created the animal world to add pure joy and amusement in our lives.  A gift if you will for us to simply love and enjoy.   Something so sweet and ever present to remind us to take it down a notch.  They never judge us or criticize our life choices or failures as long as we offer a warm lap and a scratch. When all else crumbles around us somehow, just stroking something soft behind the ears lowers the blood pressure and makes pain have less of a sting.  It makes fear seem less looming,  and even joy more complete when it's shared with an old friend.  
    It's been fun constructing this, my tribute to Tuggle post.   My girl is still kicking.  She looks no where near as old as her little 7 lb body should look.  She's still my favorite pillow pet,  book buddy,  bath buddy and welcoming committee when I return from life.   I'm so thankful for the gift she's been to my journey.   My one woman cat who endures my family life since it's an extension of me.     I don't take her for granted.  Anyone who knows me knows her.   It will be a sad day indeed when she's gone.  But I'll re read this and toss one back in her honor when that day comes.    Here's to you Tuggs!!

  

Chloe's Tulips

I can't remember if I have ever written about these special flowers before.  I'm sure I have but they make me happy so here's another post in honor of my pretty purple annuals.  And yup,  I have to tell the story again.  I'm already like an old crazy woman retelling the same stories over and over.  But this is my blog and I'll repeat myself if I want to!  :)
When Brian and I moved into this house I was 'great with child' and desperate to make the place ours.   Loving the art of gardening, each year I try to learn a little more try something new and expand my interest.    I had seen these almost black tulips in a Martha Stewart magazine that summer and fell in love with the deep dark beauties.   I hunted everywhere for them and found them on a weekend trip away with mom and Sue.   I didn't get around to planting them until mid October and Abigail and I had so much fun doing it together.  We giggled and laughed at how difficult it was for me to squat down and be able to even see much less to reach the earth in front of me due to my enormous baby belly.  It is a funny special memory of me and the Bit making our new house a home before little Chloe arrived.   Now every year when they come up I cheer in excitement and the girls and I love to see spring color back in our landscape.     It brings the memory back to us all over again and I force Chloe to pose with them.  It's the little things you know?  Happy spring!

Getting our competition on!

 had to show her her first tee shirt tie,  otherwise the company tee shirt hung lower then her shorts, it was important to me she appear to be wearing pants!  :)

 one of our favorite dancers Claudia,  she scooped Chloe away from me as soon as we walked up.  Such a sweetheart!!!

 kids will be kids after all

 just found this shot someone took for me,  this one made me cry.  She loves this so much!!  Obviously!

 This face is typical "stop with the camera mom" but also the open mouth is because I was dropping Nerds into her mouth to get her sugar up.  She wasn't allowed to eat in costume so she walked over open mouth and I fed her like a little bird.  Cute thing was other "birds" came over opened mouthed too once we were caught :)

 my dear buddy Melinda and her daughter Sophia

 she was the designated trophy girl this time, they take turns so the whole teams don't pop up. Abigail was so thrilled she got to get one! We will return it to studio this week.

 pizza night!

 this is what a worn out Bit looks like :)

We got home day before yesterday from another wild weekend of dance competitions.   I believe the other mothers lovingly refer to the way I feel as a "competition hangover".   We headed out of town to a much nicer slower town for this go round.   I braved this trip w/ both girls and I was so glad it worked out.  Chloe did great with minimal meltdowns.  She really enjoyed being involved and only melted when she couldn't be more involved.   Her worst when she slipped out from under my view and followed her sister on stage for awards.  Luckily the other mom's were watching and they grabbed her in time much to Chloe's dismay.   She loved watching her sister's "show" and the 3 of us had a blast together darting too and fro to keep up literally shedding bobby pins in our wake.
     I was so proud of our dance school.  I saw for the first time the intensity of some of these other  big schools and the skill and money they have at their fingertips.  Huge logo covered rigs and teams of men to move props around.   Some tiny kids doing olympic looking gymnastics with their dancing.  Wow.  It blew me away and Abigail too.  Our little school w/ 4 teachers held their own though!!  We took plenty of awards and especially our seniors did wonderful compared to the talent we were up against.   Abigail's groups did really well too.   We were so proud of them.  Abigail was elated to get 2 medals to keep.   I was pleased to be getting better at the whole process, and it is a process let me tell you.   Abigail is getting more used to it too.  We've learned to be comfortable being a part of a lot of crazy faces, lipstick and screams from parents next to us shouting "WERK GIRLS" !!
  I must say, it is a rush to watch her in this world.  She really is  humble thing (I've worked hard to stress that) but she gets in this world and she pops those lips out like the rest of them. She loves to perform, not be watched but to perform.  Proof in years past where she danced on empty stages with no music playing, never once looking up to see who was watching her.  It's just in her.  These kids look sassy but Abigail really has some good kids to look up to.   The faces and attitude are there for the cameras but I am learning these kid's parents and we all seem to keep most of these kids grounded and realistic. Sure, there are some that are perpetual eye rollers and back talk their mom's horribly.  I just tell Abigail behind the scenes "don't ever try talking like that to me",  she knows that won't fly in our house. My own mama taught me that!  :)  Even the teens,  they are so sweet to the little ones and know they are role models for them.  I sat next to their parents and just watched and listened in the audience.  I do that a lot to know what we've gotten into.  I'm so protective of my kids so we don't enter into this lightly.   I purposefully sit and wait on Abigail's classes sometimes just to eaves drop in the waiting room.  I do this to listen and learn what's behind the scenes.  I have to say most of the time I'm really pleased with most of these kids and families.
 The school pushes respect and good character from everyone.  I love when I see it in practice at these competitions.   We are all equally sensitive to criticism that we are now "dance mom's" and what reality TV has done to that reputation.   Well,  screw that. These mom's are amazing.  They love their kids and support them just like soccer sidelines.   Our athletes just happen to wear funny outfits and stage make up!  They work every bit as hard as any other sport, even harder and we love watching them shine in their element!!   I'm proud to be a part of this world despite the criticism.   Abigail has bounced on her bottom to music since she wore a diaper.  I have video of her at 6 months old popping off the floor in excitement when she heard a good beat!   She is where she belongs and she glows with joy in it.  If anyone had ever seen her with a soccer or basket ball they would agree, dancing is where she belongs! [and insert proud  mom, she's doing really well in it]     :)
     Me and these girls had a blast of a trip together.  We missed our Brian but next time he's supposed to be able to come with us. He he he!  I giggle with delight to think how he'll handle all the sequined glitter and divas he'll be immersed in!   My sweet soldier,  he doesn't know what's coming!   This go round was just a girl trip and we rocked it.   I will treasure hotel nights with pizza delivery and Mary Poppins together.   I just eat up these memories and love sharing this with them.
  I have designated a verse for each weekend, teaching it to Abigail to draw strength under pressure.   I love quoting our power verses together to keep Christ in our competitive endeavors.  Don't let legalism fool you,  Jesus loves music!  Abigail is learning so much about winning and losing, fear and pressures,  humility and healthy pride and esteem.  It's a work out as a mom to teach it all in balance but I welcome the challenge.  Our nation as a whole is taking the turn that shuns victory and welcomes equality in a way that eliminates important lessons.  There should be conflict, competition, winners and losers.  Kids need to learn what winning and failure feel like!!  Life brings both.   I wrote my old cheer leading coach when we got home from our last trip.  I thanked her for teaching me how to mix Christianity and athletics.   I'm using those lessons now to keep Abigail grounded.   Funny how we take things for granted as kids then realize who to thank as we age :) 
  We will do this all again in another month.  Abigail is so excited to hit the road again.   I love watching her set goals and be excited for more pressure.  She has to feel good to get through it.  I know I do!  

dance pictures for amanda

 I know you love the polka dot outfit manda, but I dont' have any good ones of her actually dancing in it

 This was her the morning of her first dance class.  A mommy and me ballet class we took when she was 2.

My buddy the insanely talented artist requested some older dance shots for painting inspiration.  So I'll post them here so she can steal what she wants.  That's why I'm posting old pictures for a few days. :)